I’ve carried a lot of mental and emotional weight over the years. It mostly goes internally for me, and I use it against myself as the reason I’m not a better wife or mom or friend or person. Blame wasn’t usually my go-to. Shame was more of my game.
Then I became a mom to older kids. The ones who argue, talk-back, don’t want to listen, are always right, think I’m ruining their life because I won’t let them watch TV all day or buy them a phone, and the list goes on. I’ve believed they were disrespectful, aggressive, out to get me, and that it was personal. My blame game became STRONG. If only they would listen, if only they weren’t so loud, if only they could see my side, etc.